Why This Mother Hates Mother's Day

**Warning** This post is filled with incessant whining, complaining, and general grumbling. If you're in a chipper bubbly mood, and you don't want to be dragged down by my ceaseless whimpering, now would be a good time to move on. (Hey. This is my blog and I can whine if I want to.)

Ok, so you know how I devoted a whole post on why I hate Secretary's Day? Well, that's NOTHING. Now you get to hear why I loath Mother's Day. Oh, lucky you.

First, some background. My parents are divorced and both remarried. My husband's parents are ALSO divorced, and his dad is remarried. Are you following along? That makes FOUR (count 'em) mothers to worry about on Mother's Day. AND, they all live in this state. AND, they all think, no....they EXPECT that we spend Mother's Day with them. Sigh. (Well, no - slight exaggeration...really, my step-mom is perfectly content with a card, so really, THREE mothers expecting that we drop everything and spend the day pampering them.)

I usually spend my Mother's Day madly cleaning and cooking for one of the above-mentioned mothers. And, no matter what, we end up ticking off a mother on Mother's Day. Because if we choose one mother to have over, the rest will feel left out and mad. So we end up doing something on the Saturday BEFORE Mother's Day for some other above-mentioned mother. I tell ya - I end up exhausted by the end of Mother's Day weekend. Exhausted AND frustrated, because the one left out ends up mad at us for not doing something for them. We deal with this EVERY year. (I think the only person that hates Mother's Day more than me, would be husband. For all these reasons PLUS he gets to listen to ME every year...)

You're probably thinking...why don't have all the mothers over and have a big brunch for all of them? Nope. Can't do that. They're divorced, remember? No one wants to spend Mother's Day with their x-spouse and the new wife. (I don't blame them.)

Or maybe you're thinking that I need to be grateful that I HAVE 4 mothers still around to have over on Mother's Day. Yeah, I know. And I am. Really. I know I will miss all of them some day. (And that guilty feeling will probably overcome me and ruin future Mother's Days.)

Or I know - you're thinking - hey! Those mothers put in their time for a lot of years. They deserve pampering. Yes, you're right, and they do. But in my opinion, so do mothers that are in the throes of motherhood! Am I wrong? The mothers that are up all night with sick kids. The mothers that shuttle their kids to school, sports, activities. The mothers that are trying to be the best mother they can be AND work outside the home. Or the mothers that stay home FULL TIME and have sacrificed to do so for their children. I could go on and on, but I'm sure you get the idea. THESE are the mothers that Mother's Day should be about. These mothers - the ones that selflessly take care of others all year long need ONE day a year for them.

You know what? JUST ONCE, I would like to do something on Mother's Day for meeeeee. I would like to go out to a nice brunch with my husband and kids. And do it GUILT-FREE. This would be heaven for me. Then I would love to come home and sit around leisurely. Or work in the garden. Or take a quiet walk. And not have to cook or clean for anyone! Just ONE day I would love to do this. But alas, this will not happen anytime soon.

Why am I bringing all of this up NOW, in April when Mother's Day is next month? Well, because my husband's sister has announced that her kids are going to be baptized. Which is WONDERFUL! I am thrilled. And I ADORE my niece and nephew. But, guess which day she's picked for this lovely occasion? May 11th. Mother's Day. She wanted them to be baptized on her 'special day' (Mother's Day.) Which, I agree, is nice. BUT, it's also my special day. And every other mother that has to go's 'special day'. And this sister lives 1 1/2 hours away. So on Mother's Day THIS year, we will be getting up at the crack of dawn. I will be getting three children ready for church in the wee hours of the morning, and we will be on the road with three sleepy grumpy kids. And with the ceremony and reception afterwards, won't get home until late afternoon or evening.

Another Mother's Day down the tubes. The only good part? Two of the above-mentioned mothers will probably be at the baptism also. So I will only tick off MY mother this year. So there's your silver lining in the rain cloud.

Sigh. I TOLD you this post would be nothing but whining. But I'm done now. And it felt good to let it all out. And now I will put my happy face BACK on and buck up.

But before I do, let me say this: I am paying attention. I am taking notes and I will remember. When MY kids are all grown up? When MY daughter is a mother? I will make sure SHE gets pampered. And my sons? I will will make sure they pamper their wives when they are in the throes of motherhood. THAT's the real silver lining.